محادثات عجب (stupid Questions & smart answers)

BOY : May I hold your hand

GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy


GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me
BOY : You love me


GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring
BOY : Sure, what's your phone number


GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest
BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple


GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever
BOY : Don't you ever want to improve


BOY : I love you and I could die for you
GIRL : How soon


BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you
GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there


SHARON : Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss
TRACY : I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his
mouth


MAN : You remind me of the sea
WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting
MAN : NO, because you make me sick


WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the other
HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth


MARY : John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly.What do u think, Peter
PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly


Girlfriend : "...And are you sure you love me and no one else"
Boyfriend : "Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday"


Teacher : "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon"
Pupil : "The moon"
Teacher : "Why"
Pupil : "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it"


Teacher : "What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested"
Pupil : "A teacher"


Waiter : "Would you like your coffee black"
Customer : "What other colors do you have


Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot "
Sam : "It's a family tradition"
Teacher : "What do you mean"
Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher"
Teacher : "What about your mother"
Sam : "She's a woman"


Tom : "How should I convey the news to my father that I've failed"
David: "You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year's performance repeated"


Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing"
Student : "Brotherly love"


Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating"
Sam : "No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good ********************"


Patient : "What are the chances of my recovering doctor"
Doctor : "One hundred percent. Medical records show that nine out of ten people die of the disease you have. Yours is the tenth case I've treated. The others all died"


Teacher : "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE"
One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day and at the same time"


Teacher : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him "
One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is hand"